Caroline Brownbill’s testimony

“I have seen and I testify that Jesus is the Son of God”  John 1:34

For the first 37 years of my life I did not believe in God and I suppose I thought of Jesus as some sort of Mother Theresa character.  There was little doubt in my mind that Jesus was a remarkable person, but I certainly didn’t think he was a diety.

 I was an air taxi pilot working out of Biggin Hill Airport. 

One night I had a dream that I was battling with an aircraft which had experienced a sudden engine seizure. It had happened because someone had forgotten to put the oil filler cap back on the starboard engine so all the oil had been sucked out.  Lack of oil meant that I couldn’t feather the propeller and the windmilling propeller was causing too much drag.  I was about to crash into the town ahead of me when I woke up. 

 

I knew that this was an unlikely scenario because flight engineers are meticulous and their work is always checked, but none the less I made a mental note to double check the oil filler caps the next morning!

 

The next day, you can imagine my shock when, I found that the starboard engine oil filler cap was missing. I still get goose bumps thinking about it!

 

I have had many dreams like that in my past which I’m sure have helped me or even saved me from harm.  Some have just served to reassure me that I would survive and that all would work out fine in the end.  

 

I had a horrendous aircraft accident when I was twenty five which I had been warned about four years before it happened and the fact that I had been told that I would make a full recovery was a huge comfort to me in the worst days after the accident.

 

Incidents such as these would make me stop and think – maybe there was someone looking out for me – a spirit world, but I tried not to dwell on events such as these. Instead I would try to gloss over them and focus on the normal, “the every day”.

 

Most people secretly believe that there is some sort of spirit world – that is why spiritualists are so busy.  Have you ever looked in the Yellow pages to see just how many there are all busily employed dabbling in communicating with the spirit world? Yet if anyone suggests speaking to God instead most people think they’re quite mad. Strange how we are naturally draw to the wrong side.

 

The next thing which happened to me was that I kept getting a series of dreams which included three people who had died whom I was close to in life; my grandad, my great aunt and my god mother.  In my dreams they kept suggesting to me that if I took notice of their spirits - then I should listen to a higher spirit, to the Holy Spirit.    I considered this for a while and in the end reasoned that if all men had spirits then Jesus would also have had a spirit.

So eventually I decided to do as my dream had instructed and try to contact the spirit world.  

I literally sat down one afternoon all by myself and prayed that the spirit of the Lord Jesus would be with me.  Nothing happened immediately and I remember being a bit sad that nothing amazing had happened then and there. 

 

Then not long after I had two amazing dreams. One of which had such a profound impact upon me that by the time I awoke the next morning I had been converted from an athiest to a Christian.  Amazing isn’t it – converted without ever entering a Church or even listening to the Gospel.  Just converted whilst I was asleep.  

 

In my dream I was walking into a beautiful restaurant. Just behind my right shoulder (so that I never saw them) was my guide who explained to me that this was one of the finest restaurants which only served the freshest foods. I was being offered the house speciality.

A waiter appeared with a huge silver platter.  He lifted the lid and there was a beautiful lamb freshly slaughtered.  At first I thought it was dead, but then it raised its head and gazed into my eyes.

 

His eyes looked straight into my soul. 

I think those who know me best would say that I have led a good and honest life and that I was the sort of person you could trust.  But as the lamb looked into my soul I could see all my imperfections and I knew there was no point even trying to defend my reasons for them.  The lamb already knew everything about me. 

I knew this lamb was my final judge and jury and I knew that there was no way I would ever dispute his opinion of me – it was completely accurate and just.  From the view point of God I fell so far short of perfection my sins were so great that there was nothing I could ever do to make things right.

 

I knew in that moment that Jesus was the son of God.  Not only that but because he was prepared to die for me, we were now bound together. He was paying the price for my feast (my pleasures, my sins). I understood then that I owed my life to Jesus and therefore I belonged to Him and that we are linked by this bond forever. Only because of this bond, by association with Him, and only by His merits will I be able to stand in the presence of God the Father.

 

Strange that to receive such a huge reward all I had to do was ask.  Jesus says he will answer the prayers of anyone who calls on Him.

 

Only a short while later I was sitting on my sofa at home next to my husband – (I think we were watching the television) when suddenly I had the most beautiful feeling of immense peace and love – like a warm shower – it was so beautiful it made me cry. I remember my husband asking me what was the matter – all I could say was “I’ll tell you in a minute its just too beautiful to speak at the moment.”

 

My dream of the dying lamb was just the start of my faith.  God has shown me in so many ways, too numerous to mention, that since the day I first asked, he has remained in my life – constant.  

I know He died for me, to pay the price I could not pay.  I know He is the only hope I have for a future back with God once I die. I know I owe Him everything. In the words of John the Baptist “I have seen and I testify that this is the Son of God.”